Corona Letters #21

Dear Fellow Quarantiners,

Today I will be interviewing a public servant.   I'm excited to interview her because she has some interesting insights about the current pandemic.

Me:  Hello!  Thank you for agreeing to this interview.  I understand that as a public servant there are certain questions I may not ask you?  And you may not opine about the current political situation?

Public Servant: You're welcome. Your understanding is correct, nothing I say is the opinion of anyone but myself, and I am limited in what I can say by the Hatch Act.

Me:  Ok.  We'll avoid politics.  So, thank you for your time.  Good night.

Public Servant: Wow, you sound like every single person I try to make small talk with at parties!

Me:  But seriously, you are a public servant who is an essential worker.  And, as I understand, you take public transportation to work.  What is that like these days?  Any hiccups?

Public Servant: Well, transportation has definitely been as issue. The commuter rail (my usual mode of transportation) has been operating under a reduced schedule and has not started by the time I leave for work. I tried to take an Uber, but the driver was not willing to have a mask-less Asian in his car, so I've been taking the subway. Did you know that some people are drunk and ready to catcall at 5 AM on a Wednesday? I didn't until last week. Thanks to the reduced schedules my trains have been extra crowded, so there's that too. Does that count as a hiccup?

Me:  Wow.  So many follow up question possibilities there.   And yes, I do know that some people are drunk and ready to catcall at 5 am.  Don't ask me how I know.   Now, did you say that an Uber driver wouldn't pick you up because you were a mask-less Asian?   Tell me, how did this make you feel?

Public Servant:  I know how you know, you've told me about your hijinks in Budapest. Anyway, this may come as a shock, but I hate being late. So more than anything else I was really mad that I was late to work because he refused to give me a ride. Then I started crying on the subway and got mad that I was now publicly crying because of a racist dude when all I was trying to do was get to work. My coworkers all offered to find him and cough on him for me though, so I feel as though the wrong has been righted.

Me:  I feel like you are making light of a very serious subject.   How do you feel about this virus being called the "Chinese Flu" and the sudden surge of sinophobia?

Public Servant:  If I took it seriously all the time I would be too busy being upset to do anything productive. I read that new research indicates that the first case of COVID-19 in NYC came from people traveling from EUROPE. Did you hear about that? Was that on the news? After 22 years of being made to feel like I'm "exotic" and "different" in a Eurocentric New England suburb, even though there are plenty of non-Europeans around, I'm not shocked that people are more ready to jump on the "Chinese people eat bats and dogs and this is all their fault" bandwagon rather than the "diseases start in all sorts of ways and everyone could do better". I don't have the emotional energy to deal with getting upset about every time people use Asian otherness as a scapegoat.

Me:  Okay then.  I think I preferred it when you were deflecting your anger with humor.   I'm sorry people are such idiots.

As we mentioned above, you are an essential worker, which means you go to work everyday while the rest of your family works/studies from home.   And, your roommate also can work from home (and has relocated to the Cape for the duration).    Because you are commuting on public transport, when you are with your family, you are treated like a contaminated pariah.  They won't hug you or go within six feet of you.  How does this make you feel?  Do you feel very isolated?

Public Servant:  Well, first of all, I feel really guilty, like I'm contaminating my loved ones by existing in the same space as them. So that's hard to deal with. It is also sad though. Today I tried to donate blood which is my biggest fear in the world, but the world needs blood donations (so please donate if you're able!). I couldn't bring my Mom to hold my hand. They couldn't find a vein and were blindly twirling a needle around in my arm for at least two minutes. I couldn't hug my family or snuggle on the couch or even hold hands through my sobs when I got home. That was really hard.

Me:  You are so brave!  I bet your Mom is very proud of you for facing your biggest fear.  Speaking of which, you are a certified EMT (but don't work as one) but you have volunteered to be on the Medical Reserve Corps if things escalate in Boston.   If you are scared of needles, doesn't it scare you to possibly expose yourself to COVID-19?

Public Servant:  No, not really. Even without COVID-19, I've had patients with HIV, all the hepatitis's, MRSA, Norwegian scabies... the risk of infection is always there. If I get sick enough to need hospitalization, I'll probably be too distracted by whatever symptoms I'm experiencing to notice an IV (I might even be intubated and sedated). I don't really think about that though, I'm young and healthy with a good immune system, so it feels like the right thing to do to use myself as a shield for those who aren't so lucky (even if that scares my mom).

Me:  I'm sure it does scare your Mom but I bet she thinks you are the bravest person she knows.   

Speaking of your Mom, isn't it her birthday tomorrow?   Any big surprises planned for her?  I mean how do you even celebrate anything during this pandemic?

Public Servant:  Oh, is it? I had completely forgotten, as did everyone else in my family I think. We just celebrated my dad's birthday last weekend, so we might be over celebrated... maybe we'll just say nothing and hope she doesn't notice! In regards to your last question, alcohol and ice cream are how you celebrate anything during this pandemic, as well as not during this pandemic.

Me:  Frowny face.  Thank you for your time.

Public Servant:  Smiley face! Thanks for waiting until after Jeopardy! 

Me:  Jeopardy time is sacred.    

I'd like to thank the Public Servant for this interview.